话说当贼也是需要天分的、当贼也是要好好下足功夫的。以下十佳笨贼的故事告诉了我们好多道理：比如“不打无准备的仗”啊，比如“不要一心二用”啊……在逗你发笑的时候也会让你多点反思吧！
爆笑盘点亚洲十佳笨贼1. Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia: Getaway car too small for heist
马来西亚吉隆坡：车太小、抢来钱也不够装
A lesson in the importance of planningahead: Two Malaysians stole US$1.3 million but had to leave half of itbehind because their van was too small to stash the loot。“The bags are quite big. I consider them quite stupid. Their planningwas very shortsighted,” said the deputy police chief, Shakaruddin CheMood。
凡事都要做好准备，以下故事就是好教训：一对马来西亚窃贼在盗取一百三十万美金之后被迫留下一半，原因是他们事先准备运钞的货车太小、根本装不下这些现钞。后来抓住他们的值班警员说：“他们的包挺大的，我觉得他们实在笨透了，他们的准备也太不充分了！”
小编：那谁说的“不打无准备的仗”，真是好有道理啊！
2. Kemaman, Malaysia: Spirit imprisons burglar for three days
马来西亚登加楼：鬼怪来帮忙、小偷得手也别想出门
Who needs a home alarm when you’ve got a ghoul for security? A Malaysian couple returned from vacation to find a serial burglar lying on their floor, famished, dehydrated and clasping his hands in apology. The criminal insisted that after hebroke into the house, a spirit blinded him and would not let him moveor scream for 72 hours。
如果你有鬼怪看门、谁还需要门警系统？一对马来西亚夫妇度假归来发现一个连续作案的窃贼躺在他家的地板上，已经饿得奄奄一息、还脱水。这名罪犯后坚称他破门之后被这家人屋里的鬼怪困住、整整72小时不许他动、也不准他叫。
小编：连鬼都看不下去了，可真是天网恢恢、疏而不漏啊！
3. Hubei province, China: Robber flushes diamond rings down the toilet
中国湖北：强盗把到手的钻石冲下马桶
Zhou broke into a wealthy home and foundtwo huge diamond rings. He decided they were too good to be true, so,like anyone with half a brain (yes, only half) he flushed them down thetoilet. The robber didn’t realize that the jewels were real until afterhe was caught. Poor thing was “unable to stop sighing repeatedly。”
这位周姓盗贼闯进一家富人家、发现了两枚巨大钻戒。他当下认定它们太好、看起来不像真的，所以，就如同所有只有半边脑子的人那样(是，只有半边脑子)，他把它们冲下了马桶。直到这名盗贼被抓、他才知道这些珠宝都是真的。这可怜的家伙“禁不住不停叹息”。
小编：想这笨贼自己肯定都恨死自己了，别的我们也不用多说。
4. Ningbo, China: Persistent burglar hides under bed for two days
中国宁波：笨贼毅力惊人、藏于床下两天！
Burglar Li is not one to give up easily.He snuck into a woman’s apartment and found nothing of value. So he hidunder her bed for two days, surviving on the sole apple in her fridge,until she returned. Li waited until she was asleep, stole her cell andmoney, and was promptly arrested。
李姓窃贼可不是那种轻易放弃的人。他溜进一间女子的公寓、发现没什么值钱东西。于是他躲藏在房间的床底、靠冰箱里一个苹果撑整整两天。直到主人归来，他才从床底爬出，偷了主人随身带的手机和现金。不过紧跟着就被抓住了。joozone.com