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高考满分英语作文是这样炼成的!(2)

时间:2010-05-06来源:英语作文网栏目:高考英语作文作者:网友供稿 英语作文收藏:收藏本文
高考 满分英语作文是这样炼成的!#e# 下面是作文地带提供的一则范例: (2007年北京试卷)假设你是李华,要给英国笔友Harry写封信,介绍你班两位同学竞选班长的过程。请按下图顺序描述。(20分) 注意:1.信的开头已
作文地带-英语作文网高考满分英语作文是这样炼成的!#e#

下面是作文地带提供的一则范例:

(2007年北京试卷)假设你是李华,要给英国笔友Harry写封信,介绍你班两位同学竞选班长的过程。请按下图顺序描述。(20分)

注意:1.信的开头已为你写好。2.词数不少于60。

提示词:竞选班长monitor election

(二)评分标准:

第一档:(18分~20分)。完全完成了试题规定的任务:覆盖了所有内容要点;运用了多样的句式和丰富的词汇;语法或用词方面有个别错误;有效地使用了语句间的连接成分。

第二档:(15分~17分)。完全完成了试题规定的任务:覆盖了所有内容要点;运用的句式和词汇能满足要求;语法和用词基本准确;使用了简单的语句间连接成分,所写内容连贯。

第三档:(12分~14分)。基本完成了试题规定的任务:覆盖了内容要点;运用的句式和词汇基本满足任务要求;语法和用词方面有一些错误,但不影响理解。

第四档:(6分~11分)。未恰当完成试题规定的任务:漏掉或未描述清楚主要内容;所用句式和词汇有限;语法或用词方面的错误影响了对所写内容的理解。未能清楚地传达信息。

第五档:(1分~5分)。未完成试题规定的任务:明显遗漏主要内容;句式单调、词汇贫乏;语法错误较多 。

第六档:0分。未能传达任何信息;所写内容与要求无关。

(三)参考答案:  One possible version:

How are things going?

Last Monday, our class held a monitor election.  This was our first election, so everyone was excited. Two of my classmates took part in the race; Liu Dong and Wang Hong. They each gave a speech telling us what they would do when they were elected. Then we voted for the monitor. The result was 28 to 15 in Wang Hong’s favor. Wang Hong became our new monitor. The whole class cheered for her, and she promised to do the best she could for us all.

Best wishes,

                  Li Hua

(四)学生的作文:

(1)______分

Last Monday, an exciting monitor election was held in my class. The two candidates are Liu Dong and Wang Hong. In the beginning of the election, each of them gave a speech to us and talked about the future plan. Then the most exciting moment came. Every student stood up and walked to the election box to cast a vote to his/her ideal monitor.

I thought Wang Hong was well qualified for this position. So I wrote down her name and put my note into the box. Several minutes later, the final result came. Compared to Liu Dong’s 15 votes, Wang Hong got 28 votes and became or monitor. We all congratulated to Wang Hong and believed that she would serve our class heart and soul in the future.

What about the monitor election in your class? I hope that I will receive your reply soon.

                             ( 2 )______分

Last Monday, we had a monitor election. At the beginning the two candidates, LiuDong and Wang Hong gave us a speech introducing themselves and telling us their plans in the future. Then we had a vote. We wrote down the name of the better one in our mind and put the paper in a box. Then the exciting time came that our teacher counted the number and wrote it on the blackboard. The result was that 28 students who voted Wang Hong, 13 more than the number of students who voted LiuDong, which meaned WangHong was elected as our monitor. Wang is really pretty good. I believe she will be a good monitor.

(五)得分与启示

第一篇得分:19分;第二篇得分:13分。

启示:

1.第一篇得了高分是因为该文内容要点全,符合交际要求、语言地道,有复杂句式,顺畅连接和准确用语。

2.第二篇得了三档的分数是因为该文虽然内容要点齐全,但语言功底不够,句式平庸,只会一般词汇,且有一定语言错误。

3.考生要想得一个高分就一定要注意内容要全,连接要顺畅,句式要有变化,符合交际要求。    

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