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2011英语六级高分范文(八)

时间:1970-01-01来源:网络资源栏目:Essay作者:未知 英语作文收藏:收藏本文
摘要:1)现在有越来越多人的选择节食,有的人是为了健康,但是更多的人是为了有一个苗条的身材 根据所给提纲,本文应包含如下内容:描述越来越多的人节食的现象并分析主要原因;阐述节 Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a comp
摘要:1)现在有越来越多人的选择节食,有的人是为了健康,但是更多的人是为了有一个苗条的身材 根据所给提纲,本文应包含如下内容:描述越来越多的人节食的现象并分析主要原因;阐述节

  Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic On Dieting. You should write at least 150 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:

  1)现在有越来越多人的选择节食,有的人是为了健康,但是更多的人是为了有一个苗条的身材

  2)分析节食减肥可能带来的影响

  3)你的建议

  On Dieting

  _______________________________________________________________________________

  _______________________________________________________________________________

  _______________________________________________________________________________

  行文思路  我要看看

  本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点指出一种现象并要求说明原因,提纲第2点要求分析这种现象可能带来的影响,提纲第3点要求针对该现象提出“我”的建议,由此可判断本文应为现象解释型作文。

  根据所给提纲,本文应包含如下内容:描述越来越多的人节食的现象并分析主要原因;阐述节食不当可能带来的影响;针对节食给出“我”的建议。

  高分范文

  On Dieting

  Nowadays more and more people are beginning to go on a diet. Some people are concerned with their health, and they go on a diet in order to lose unwanted weight. But still others, [1]especially the young women, are paying too much attention to their outward appearance. They [2]become the leading numbers who go on a diet.

  [3]However, dieting might [4]bring great negative effects on people. [3]For one thing, quite a lot of people don’t really need dieting to keep health, and they diet just because they want to keep slim. For them, dieting [5]not only is useless but also might damage their health. [3]For another, some people lack enough knowledge on how to diet scientifically. [3]As a result, they are likely to suffer from malnutrition.

  [6]Considering the serious damage of unhealthy dieting, we should be cautious in dieting. [3]In my opinion, dieting,[7]for whatever reasons, needs professional guidance. [8]Only with right guidance can dieting work [9]as we expect.

  【亮点点评】

  [1]“尤其”,表示强调。

  [2]“成为主力军”。

  [3]过渡衔接词语,使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。

  [4]用于引出对危害或负面影响的阐述。

  [5]“not only… but also”用于连接并列成分。

  [6]“考虑到,鉴于”,介词。

  [7]“不管因为什么原因”,whatever意为“无论什么”。

  [8]“only+状语”位于句首,引起句子部分倒装。

  [9]“像我们期望的那样”。

  佳句临摹

  1.佳句:For them, dieting not only is useless but also might damage their health.

  临摹:基因技术不仅使动植物受益而且还有助于提高人类的生活质量。

  ___________________________________________________________________________.

  2.佳句:In my opinion, dieting, for whatever reasons, needs professional guidance.英语作文
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