习作原文：(Joozone 精彩点评见下方)

Protect the Earth保护地球
The earth, the only mother of human beings, is now facing a great threat-environmental pollution. Therefore, it is important for all of us to protect the earth, for she is only home to all peoples living on it.
Throughout the world, environmental pollution is becoming more and more serious as a result of various reasons .First of all, the rapid economic and social development is producing a large amount of pollution in form of gas, waster and waste;. Besides, People's poor awareness of environmental protection is also another important factor contributing to environmental problems. For example, a large number of people have developed the habit of using plastic bags and white lunch boxes which do great harm to environment. What’s worse, many people are cutting ting down increasing number of trees, causing soil erosion. In addition, the management of the government also contributes to serious pollution. Therefore, we must take measures to prevent the earth from being polluted.
Living on this beautiful planet, we must actively contribute to beautifying the environment. It's important to improve the environmental awareness of human beings. The factories should reduce the discharge of sewage and gas. People should learn to use clean energy such as Solar, Nuclear and Hydrogen energy. The government should make some laws to ban different harmful pollution. Let’s change words into action!
The earth is our only home. From now on, everybody should protect the environment and make our home a better world.
( 指导老师：Joozone)

批改：

1. …for she is only home to all peoples living on it. 建议此句改为：…for she is the only home to all people living on it. 这里， only前面一般是要带上修饰语的，如：the only person 唯一的人； my only son我唯

一的儿子。 另外，people是一个集合名词，本身就是一个复数，“人，人们”， 所以，在此没必要加上s. (但是，如果people当“民族”讲时，可是视为可数名词)。

2. What’s worse, many people are cutting ting down increasing number of trees. 我们有： a number of 大量的； numbers of 大量的。 但没有number of. 因此，本句可改为： What’s worse, many people are cutting

down an increasing number of trees.

参考例句(文)：

1. Therefore, it is important for all of us to protect the earth, for she is only home to all people living on it. From Joozone.com.

2. What’s worse, many people are cutting down an increasing number of trees, causing soil erosion. In addition, the management of the government also contributes to serious pollution.
 

专家点评：

本文从总体上来看，写得非常好，语言运用很到位，个别句子写得相当不错。可见作者在语言基本功的掌握上还是比较扎实的。 全文中心突出，内容丰满，首尾照应，画龙点睛。
给分理由：
本文给人的第一印象特别好，顺畅的语言读起来朗朗上口。尽管有两处表达相当欠佳的地方，但无伤大体。因此，给出一个高分，98,希望作者再接再厉，更上一层楼。